martes, 5 de agosto de 2014

Smoke gets in your eyes… sometimes ten times harder than the PSA propaganda

You know kids, you shouldn’t smoke. It gets you cancer and it’s not a thing that is going to make you instantaneously cool or some crap like that. So do yourselves a favor and stay away from tobacco, and I’ll guarantee to you that you’re going to have a long, healthy and prosperous life.

 Okay, now with that said: Why you people feel the necessity of demonize smokers and second hand smoke? It’s redundant to remind the dangers of smoking at this point.

And this mascot was supossed to appeal to the younger audiences, just let that sink in 


I mean, this aren’t the 60´s, people know that smoking it’s one of the most common way to die considering the addictive factor and the social conventions that people have around the whole habit. It’s not like smokers or tobacco companies try to convince you that smoke cigarettes is a good idea (and it’s not), but you can’t blame them for becoming rich at the expense of the health of people who just want to relax and have a good time with his death roll.

 Okay, think about a low-class man, who works 24/7 and want to relax after a hard day of work, what does he do? Light a cigarette and let the nicotine (a stimulating drug that is also used as insecticide), produce a chemical called acetylcholine that gets into the brain cells that controls muscular movement, the respiratory process and the heart beating, creating a state of “relaxation” in the body.

So this hard-working man can feel his body rested, so he can be prepared for another day of work, even though he can get cancer if he starts to smoke too many cigarettes and continue with this habit for a long period of time. So, it’s probable for this poor guy to die in their 60’s because he can’t quit this habit and can’t afford to pay a cancer treatment depending how much does that cost.

What’s the point here? That if you try to found a way to escape from your reality you better found one that doesn’t destroy your body as well, but if you’re going to do it anyway take responsibility of your acts and don’t blame a bunch of tobacco rolls for your lung cancer.

The thing is that even if you try to use an alternative way to relaxation like the Electronic Cigarettes (who can also contain a few toxins and therefore be just as dangerous), you can’t hide the fact that your body needs a form of addiction to feel fine.

Considering the way that anti-Tobacco campaigns try to fight against the influence of smoking in our society, I can’t avoid to notice that we always try to find a scapegoat to the things that are wrong with us as citizens, but Tobacco companies, even if they’re a bunch of corporate pigs, they became rich and powerful through entrepreneurship, they never fool the people because the dangerous of smoking was discovered in 1966 by Richard Doll, before that, cigarette were pretty much like candy for adults.

And let me tell you something, I’m not a smoker, I’ve never smoke a cigar in my life, but there has been several occasions were I’ve been exposed to second hand smoke in closed places, and I’m still just as healthy as always, so I’m very skeptical about the “dangers” of second hand smoke, I mean it can be annoying, but not extremely dangerous like smoke 500 cigarettes per day, that is just silly. So, if you’re going to put your life at risk, try to be careful when you’re blowing smoke so you can stay near to your non-smoker pals.

And that’s the other thing about these kinds of addictions; you can also affect the people around you. For example, my parents used to be smokers when I was a little kid, but they quit because they don’t want to risk my health, I’m very thankful to them for that but they also though me to treat with respect the decisions that people take about their own body.


So remember kids, if you want to ruin your lungs just to be “cool” then you’re going to ending up dying in our forties and going to make your beloved ones very sad because of your selfishness, if you’re a hard-working man that use the cigarettes to make you stressful day a little bit more tolerable, just remember to quit while you still have time, and if you’re one of those guys who still blame and demonize tobacco companies for the death of thousand people per year, you need to do your proper research and stop blowing smoke buddy. Good night everybody.

martes, 22 de julio de 2014

The perks of being Jewish: you’re being associated with business savvy, you’re being able to make fun of yourself, and you belong to the chosen people.

You know, I’m not a Jew but I’m not an anti-Semitic idiot like most trolls on the internet either. I don’t think the situation between the three most prominent religions in the world its okay. But I am just wondering: what’s the big deal with Jews? Jesus, some people take this issue with these people way too far.

I mean, when people talk about Jews it’s always the same two sides, it’s Jews are the scum of the Earth, or it’s Jews are the chosen people and therefore the need to be protected by the holiness of the always beloved political correctness, where the hell it’s the middle ground to this?

It is because it’s one of the first (if not THE first) monotheist religion that came up? It is because they talk about of being the chosen people? It is because they killed Jesus Christ even though a lot of people got killed that way during that time period?

Wow, even kids movies aren't saved from the Jewish Stereotyping

All the reasons to hate Jews are so confusing and contradictory that people seems to hate just for the sake of hating someone. And I’m not against rip on people for comedic effect and stuff, but some people take the “hate the chosen people” way too seriously. Jews aren’t greedy, evil, of manipulate, Jews are just people with delusions of grandeur, just like every religion in this planet.

If you research a little bit of Jewish history, the reason of why they didn’t accept J.C as their lord and savior it’s because: a) he did not fulfilled the prophecies in the bible, b) the Christian theology contradicts some of the estates in the Torah, and c) the revelation of a prophet is based in national pride, that it means that the TRUE messiah of the chosen people will be a pure-blood Jew who will raise in the holy land of Israel.

Yes, maybe Jesus could turn water into wine, walk above water and multiply bread and fishes, but he did not built the third temple of Jerusalem, he did not reunite the people on Israel and because he talked about the idea of God divided in three entities (the father, the son and the holy spirit), his story contradicts the vision of an incorporeal divinity that God represents.

And people then say thae Jews are the bad guys, Jesus Christ give me a break

The messiah, according to Judaism will became from human parents, not a Virgin impregnated by God himself, yes, the Jewish beliefs are very elitist and self-centered, but they also have a more optimistic vision about material world, they doesn’t talk about the material world as something that is need to be avoided like the Muslims and Christians.

They use their human intelligence and cleverness to rise in every place that they installed, the only reason that people say they’re greedy it’s because they know how to approach the things that God gave to them in earth instead of… you know, talk about damnation, sin and redemption of our souls through prays and confessions. Jews has their own morals, but that doesn’t mean they think of suffer and pain all the time. They’re not greedy, just self centered and intelligent.

And in top of that, they don’t talk about a relation with God through intermediaries, and Jesus, being the “son of God” it’s blasphemy to them. And again, they take the blood heritage thing very seriously, because according to their religion, the prophet descends directly from the David King bloodline, from the father side. And at last but not least, the whole reason Christians establish that Jesus is the chosen one is for some misinterpretations in the Old Testament,  in Hebrew the words “soul” and “virgin” are very similar, so when Christianity talks about a virgin that gave birth, Judaism refers to a soul gave birth.

Judaism doesn’t talk about miracles, it talks about revelations, and they think that Israel is the place where the savior is going to rise, so even if you’re Christian, you need to understand why Jews doesn’t believe in Jesus Christ, not hating them because they don’t have your same viewpoints.

And the other thing that I don’t get about this debate is when people talk about Jews as a race. Apparently some folk’s years ago labeled Jewish people as a race with common characteristics instead of beliefs. And that’s just strange, considering that Semitism is referred to people who talk Semitic languages, and that include Muslims as well.

Even if the assume that Jews are a race, they need to consider this: The messiah of the Christianity is, in fact, a Jew. So that does it mean that without Judaism, there’s no Christ, and also that implies that, ethnically, all Christians are Jews, but wait, Christians are not labeled as a race like the Jews, they’re just a religion, so this whole race thing it’s just as contradictory and nonsensical as most of the stuff written in the Bible.

Is there evil Jewish people? Of course, the same way they’re evil Muslims, evil Christians, evil atheists and overall evilness in every group of people that want to control their peers with intolerance and bigotry. The mankind is evil, the things that we say against groups of other people it’s just a way to create scapegoats to feel better about ourselves.

The Truth is, that no matter how hard we try, there’s always a chance to became greedy power-hungry monsters like the Zionists that, by the way, are not evil because they’re Jewish, they’re evil because they’re human beings with power and a big friend called “political correctness” who can help them to hide from legitimate criticism through the old “blame the Jews” excuse.

They came, they're bad and they will own Jew kid...


So, the next time someone tell you that Jews are evil (the news, your racist friends or whatever) just remember: every person has a Jew inside their souls. If Jews are greedy, manipulative, war instigators and self-center elitist douche bags, so that means that the whole mankind is Jewish. So, with that said, it’s better to start to hate ourselves as human beings as well. Good luck you rats.


I hope Jew don’t mind the puns but, I’ve got to Goy, I been shtick around the computer for way too long and if I don’t oy vey my doctor about schlep a little bit, I’m going to kittel myself one of these days, so shalom guys, what yutzi is what jew got.

martes, 8 de julio de 2014

City of God Review: Yes, that’s going to be the topic today… Any questions?

Well, the English class is over and I’m enjoying my short vacations doing what I like to do the most. And that’s watching movies and TV shows. For example, I’m watching a show called “Mad Men” created by Matthew Weiner, one of the writers from The Sopranos, but I’m going to talk about that in other post.
But, this is hard for me to do it, because a reviewer needs to keep subjective when it comes to analyze something and the movie that I’m going to do it happens to be one of my favorite films of all time. I’m talking of course of Fernando Meirelles crime drama masterpiece “Cidade de Deus” City of god for those who don’t talk Portuguese.

You came to the wrong neighbourhood Motherf*cker


And just in case you don’t know, I don’t care, and I’m going to write this in capitals so you can understand it I DON’T CARE about the world cup, so this particular choice has absolute nothing to do with the demise of Brazil during the Match with Germany (although it was kinda funny watching them lose the game in their own country)

But, enough with the pointless talking and let’s starting with the reviewing (Spoiler Alert):

We opened the movie watching a chicken escaping in a favela, where a group of gangsters chase it around the streets. The animal stops in front of a young photographer called Buscapé (Rocket) who is the main character and narrator. Buscapé thinks that the Gang wants to kill him and suddenly we cut to a flashback to explain the whole story. And that’s where the movie begins.

We learn that Buscapé was raised in a very poor town in the sixties and his brother Marreco (Goose), was part of a little gang called “the tender trio” along with his friends Cabeleira (Shaggy) and Alicate (Clipped) who stole money from people from the outside and split it with thwe citizens. Kind of like Robin Hood, so they were respected for that.

But one day, Dadihno (Lil Dice), a boy who idolized the Trio suggested them to assault a Motel in order to abandon their thieves’ lives and escape to something better. Dadihno however, was a very violent and ambitious kid who wanted to grow up to become a gangster and he suggested them to do it because he wanted to be initiated into that life. The Trio, of course do not let him to do that and assign him as lookout.
But during the assault, someone broke a glass in the motel and activated the alarm; the Trio, who wanted to take the money without killing anyone, escaped very quickly and didn’t earned enough money to escape from their life crime. The three gangsters split up and tried to redeem themselves after that day.

Cabeleira fell in love with a woman and later decided to work in order to change his life, Marreco started to work selling fishes with his father warning his brother to not choose the life of crime and keep studying, and Alicate joined the church. But an incident related with a man killing his wife because she had an affair with Buscape´s brother brought attention t the police, resulting in the death of Cabeleira during an escape.

Later, in the seventies we follow the misadventures of Buscapé tring to lose the virginity with a girl named Angelica, who was part of a group of Hippies from the Favela who smoke marihuana and went to parties and stuff. Buscapé, who developed a passion for photography was the official photographer and the one responsible of getting the weed.

But one day he went to the apartment where his official Pot Dealer Neguinho (Blackie) was taking by surprise by Dadihno, who change his name to Ze Pequeno (Lil Ze) and discovered through a flashback story that he was the one who broke the glass from the motel and later he killed everyone in there. Later he killed Buscape’s brother when he tried to take the money he stole. And after that he started his new life as a gangster along with his best friend Bené (Benny), who was the older brother of Cabeleira.

Benny, who was the Jiminy Cricket of Ze, prevented him to start a feud with a gangster called Cenoura (carrot) who was Bene’s friend and the only gangster leader who was not killed by Ze during his rise to power.

Then, everything went surprisingly peaceful in the Favela. Angelica became Bene’s boyfriend; Ze stopped some group of kids called “The runts” from robbing and vandalizing the favela without his authority; Buscapé went through a series of unfortunate events until he got a job in the newspaper; Neguinho was expelled from the apartment; and Bené decided to leave the life of crime where he was shot by Neguinho who wanted to killed Ze and not him.

Ze, without Bene being the voice of reason, became crazier and started a war against Cenoura. But first, he took a personal revenge and raped a girl who reject him during the farewell party of Bene and humiliated his boyfriend Mané Galinha (Knockout Ned). And not only that, he decided to murder the guy in his house and killed his brother and Uncle instead. So Mané, who was a pacifist decided to join Cenoura’s gang in order to take revenge against Lil Ze.

And After a lot of assaults, people joining one side or another for revenge and murder after murder after murder, the mob war has begun. Buscapé who just wanted to survive in that crzy world became the official photographer of Lil Ze and his gang when he took a picture of them with their guns and accidentally gave the photos to the press and spread the word about Ze’s mob family (although that was the thing Ze wanted, but Buscapé wasn’t aware).

And finally we get to the beginning of the film when Buscapé was found by Ze’s gang and just in that moment, the police and Cenoura’s gang appeared and started their last battle. Resulting in Mané getting killed by a kid who searched for revenge against him because he killed his father in one of the assaults, Ze and Cenoura got arrested but Ze was released by the corrupt cops and that moment was captured by Buscape. And finally, The Runts killed Ze in the same alley and took his place as the mob leaders of the Favela completing the cycle of violence and ending the film on a high note.

Wow, that was a lot of Writing don’t you think? I mean, this a very complex movie in terms of writing and argument so ther’e a lot of things that I couldn’t leave out, but I hope you don’t mind.
So, what’s my opinion about the film? Well… that it’s freaking awesome. The music, the story, the writing, the acting, the pacing and the fact that every actor in this film came from the favelas in real life make this movie one of the most gruesome and realistic crime flicks of all time.

But if I had to choose some nitpick, I’d say that the main character it’s not that interesting. Don’t get me wrong, the guy is very likeable. But it’s very evident that he’s just there to be the vehicle of the story via narration instead of one character with a much bigger role. But, to be fair, a movie with the incredible amount of subplots and story arcs like this it’s very hard to get through that.

And it’s very interesting the influence of Tarantino films in this movie. You can notice that not only in the narrative, but also in the style and the aestheticization of violence presented during the most violent secuences.

The good thing about this it’s that gave us the benefit of the doubt about the gangster’s life. Instead of trying to convince us about something, it showed us why this happens and showed us that through the point of view of three-dimensional characters. I mean even Lil Ze, who is depicted as a sociopath with no redeemable qualities, has his own reasons to do what he think is right. He just want to be respected, he wanted to be more powerful, but that life corrupted him to the point of insanity and ended the same way it started: with a grown up gangster being shot by a kid.

So if don’t watched: what the hell are you doing reading this? Go and watch it right now. It’s one of those flicks you must see before you die. Sure that I did it and I’m going to watch it over and over before leaving this world.


And that was my post from today. Take care and study to become an important person in the future. Unless you want to be a movie star like the people who participated in this film. So… don’t listen to me and choose books over crooks. Bye.

martes, 24 de junio de 2014

OK, I confess that I don't have nothing for this post, so...

I'm going to improvise. I'm not gonna promise any good thing, but I'll try my best. Pray for me.

ER MAH GERD RANDOM PICTURE OF THE DAY... keep it on Stappy...


So, 5 years since the death of Michael Jackson. Yea, It's funny how every year people celebrate the anniverary of his death like it was his birthday or something like that. I'm not a fan of him, I mean, I recognize that he's was a very talented fella, but it wasn't for me.

His music style was never my type, I'm more into rock and roll from the 60s to 2000's so I never got the chance to learn about him like I did with other musicians.

But I still feel sorry for him. Not that much for his dead, but mostly for his last years in this world. So many things happened to him beetween the media coverage, the child molestaion accusations, the... plastic surgery that slowly dissolved his body into a lifeless skeleton that needed to die soon. The poor guy suffered so much in his last years, but at least he is in peace now. So that was for you Mikey.

And the other thing that I want point out is... Doug... wat r u doin... Doug... Stahp. Seriously Mr. Walker. What the hell happened to you. You started as a humble and funny internet reviewer with a lot of energy and creativity and now you're just a sellout.

I mean, Adventure Time Vlogs? Really? you want to cash on the fanbase of a show aimed at toddlers and is watched by grown men. That's low man, really, really low. And now you want to people to donate to a Indiegogo campain for an online game show, even though your website Thatguywiththeglasses.com is valued in almost 2 million dollars and generate $666,720 PER YEAR.

And the last Thing I want to Talk about beacuse I got run out of ideas is: What's the big deal with people and football. I'm sorry, I know I already talked about this but... Why you destroyed public property when your team wins a match?. That makes no sense whatsoever and yet people keeps doing it

Ah, good grief, it's the same circus NEARLY every 4 years and it keeps going on and on and on and I still don't get it. You're supposed to celebrate getting drunk and killing braincells instead of destroy thing that belongs to your beloved country you... EEEDIOT!!!

It's the most irrational thing that I've ever seen in my life. And I've seen a lot of stupid things happening before, but this... it takes the prize to the most embarassing behaviour in the history of public embarassment, what a waste.

And that's all for today. Good night, take care and... read a book or something.

miércoles, 18 de junio de 2014

Class#10: All Bad things must come to an end... and my English is certainly one one of them.

I admit it. My English kinda sucks, okay? I mean it's not like I can't understand the languaje at all, it's just... put it this way: If I had send to U.K or the United States or whatever, I would be totally totally lost and dead in a matter of hours. I can't communicate properly.

HODOR!!!


And now you ask me how is that possible if you're writing this entire post in english. Well my friend, the answer is simple. I don't have good pronunciation. I can differentiate the "Your" from the "You're" but I can't say those words without sound like a baby with his tongue bite.

Eeyup, my pronunciation is as good as a kindergartner trying to read a Shakespeare play. And considering that most of the movies and shows that I watch are in English, that's pretty bad. And again, I can understand the words and the sentences in the proper context. But it's still dificult to me talk the languaje like an english man.

But here's the funny thing. I can talk very fluid through impressions. I don't like to be an arrogant prick or anything like that, but I know how to imitate the voice of a lot of characters, I learn the sounds, I learn the accents and suddenly my english languaje gets better. It's the weirdest thing ever, I know that.

And I just don't know why... maybe is because it's because I got abetter understanding of the sounds of a languaje rather than their meaning. It's like when you hear a comedian doing an impression of the japanese languaje. I mean, it's very clear he doesn't know how to speak it, but he knows how it sounds, he understand the accent, the tone, the most common sounds and letters used and even some of the most used words like Gomenasai, Arigato, or whatever.

So... does that mean that my english has no future at all. probably not. Can I improve my skills in the future so I can speak the language like the common people and not through silly impressions. If your answer was yes... You're Goddamn Right.

Goodbye level 4. I'm going to miss you.

miércoles, 11 de junio de 2014

Class #9: Just when I thought I was out... They pull me back in...

The experience of studing in a university taught me a lot of things. But if had to choose the most important of all of them is: Never fail a single class or else you're gonna pay for it (literally)

Being a student of journalism, one of the most important things in my career is the ethics. If you're not an ethical person, you're screwed at least for one more year. Failed the ethics class toally stabbed me back in my second year in this university. Now I'm an ENTIRE year late because of that.

And the fact that my teacher is a total nazi when it come to evaluation doesn't help either. He constantly tries no make me feel like garbage and remind that he is a very influential person. Maybe he knows more than me, but that doesn't mean he is a good person or a guy who deserves respect from the new generations.

And if we talk about my personal life, I've barely seen my friends during this year, I still got no date (but I've never cared about that so it doesn't really matter), I've got sick from the stomach during the hazing party in my university, some of my favorite TV shows were cancelled (seriously NBC executives, are you mentally challenged or what?) and I discovered that my favorite internet reviewers is a sellout.

Does that means that my life is so bad that I'm going to kill myself in the future? hell no, I'm not a lousy emo kid. My life is not bad, just boring and tired. I don't know what to think or what to do, so I spend my entire recess time watching Felicity in my computer and listening Creed music. Yes, I've listened those guys, pray for me.

And if there has been some good stuff that has happened to me this semester, well... I went to one of my friends birthday party and I sang karaoke with my family because we were celebrating the baby shower of my aunt in law.

I hope next semester to be better than this one. But I can't tell if that is going to be true so... Yeah, that's my thoughs about this year. Take care.

martes, 10 de junio de 2014

Yay, The World Cup is about o start and… honestly I don’t give a crap

*Warning: explicit language

I don’t get it. I just really, really, really, REALLY don’t get it. I have nothing against those people, who enjoy, but football soccer does absolutely nothing for me and I don’t know why.

Maybe is because my father traumatized me with his constant yelling when I was a kid, maybe is because I met a lot of soccer fans during my life who were total assholes with me and I learned to hate them because of that, or perhaps I’m just a pussy… well, whatever the reason, I just don’t care.

And I know what you’re thinking: If he doesn’t care about it, why is he dedicating an entire post about it? That’s just stupid. And you’re totally free to believe that, even I think that I’m a humorless douchebag sometimes. But my point is: Why this thing is supposed to be important for me; the answer, if you’re not figured out already, is: It doesn’t.

But, if I think about it, the sport itself it’s not the thing that bothers me. Seriously: why am I supposed to hate a bunch of brainless guys chasing a ball with their feet during 90 minutes? The thing that bothers me is this:

I'm pretty sure that this is the image that inspired Pablo Picasso to draw Guernica... I've seen nests of rats more organized than this.

The stupidity of the football players is nothing compared to the average “intelligence” of a football fan, even Jon Snow knows more than those imbeciles. Of course, I’m not talking about ALL the fans, there obvious exceptions. I’m talking about those uneducated, trash-talking, Cro-Magnon shitheads that constantly beat the crap out of each other in order to prove who the superior team/club/country is.

I mean, I get that competition it’s something that belongs to human nature and to be fair, the idea of supporting your team and be with your friends enjoying a sport game it’s a very funny activity. But, come on, could football fans be any more racist/supremacist when it comes to talk about the other teams.

It’s kind of disturbing to me see the people of my country preparing their hate speech against Brazilians, Spanish, Argentineans, or whatever. Part of it is because I hate my own country. I think I live in a land of arrogant fart-smellers and ultra-nationalist twats who think they’re the British’s of America. The British’s of America? Give me a break.

And the worst part is that these people teasing everybody about how good they are. Even people from the same country like me. If I don’t love my country then I’m a horrible person. Well, you know what? Yes I’m a friggin’ monster because I don’t like this stupid country and I don’t give a crap about pretend that I need to feel superior to the other countries. I’m not exactly a huge fan of Adolf Hitler for your information.

Getting back on track, here’s my question: Does win the world cup is going to make any difference about how the rest of the world sees us? Well, my answer is a big, fat, redundant and despicably obvious NO. So stop nagging people about it.


To finish this post I declare myself not a football and proudly scream: Screw you guys, I’m goin’ home.